Videos of Resnickers sharing space and moving their horses generally show a person moving calmly but confidently, sometimes waving a wand. When this person's intention is to move a horse, she walks toward it, and the horse magically moves away.
I have had a problem moving George in this way. The only times he moves away from me is when I'm angry at him. (This has happened on a number of occasions.) I just can't summon up enough chutzpah to make my aura move his, without resort to some form of violence - e.g. raising my voice, waving my arms or a stick, or getting mad.
But I've discovered I can make him move. I go up to him, and I say, "Ahem, George, excuse me, would you mind please stepping back - or to the side or towards me or wherever." And he will comply. Not with the best grace, admittedly, but hey, you can't have everything all at once, right?
Today we were hanging out, and he really just wanted to chill and have me stand by his tail and protect him from a rear attack (I guess?). I spent time doing this, but I also asked him to practice a little bit of moving for me. He was very good at this, and every time he moved, I'd skip away back from him to take the pressure right off; then he'd come up to me again. He got tired of this after a while and wandered off, looking slightly peeved. Oh, George, you are such an emotional roller coaster for me.
Anyway, when I was thinking I couldn't move George, I guess I was thinking about it wrong. What I can't do is move George without first establishing a connection to him. I think the next thing is to try action-at-a-distance. And I think I might try using treats, as although the thought of treats does make the poor boy go quite demented, it also is a sure fire way of currying favor with him.
Or, I should just forget "working" with George, because he is my daughter's after all, and what he seems to really want from me is just affection and intimacy. Whereas little Bridget seems keen to "do things" and she's the one who's supposed to be "my" horse. So maybe George should be my grand-horse, and I should do the things which Grand-people are supposed to do - namely spoil him. I dunno.
You and George! He likes to keep you guessing.
ReplyDeleteI have found that Leading from Behind ritual to be a very good way of connecting with Ben when he gets that closed, sour "buzz off" expression. We had quite a few fun and games with it last winter. I rarely do it now, but when I do he always turns and is, not cowed at all, but open and soft again. But I think these rituals, like anything else, can turn into an empty technique if they are not done "in the moment". For me, that is the huge challenge and joy Ben gives me. He asks me to be present and spontaneous. I am a great planner, and thinking on my feet like that is something I have not done easily since a child I suppose.
it's interesting that you say that, because when George walked off looking peeved, I felt an urge to walk behind him and make him move. An urge I ignored in favor of going to see Bridget. Maybe I should have following my instinct.
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